kelley long

I do not expect to join any New Year party this year..

but this is a surprise for me..

My first time joining a New Year count down with hundreds of people..

hot, high, happy cus we have music and dance..

say goodbye to 2005..? 2005 is a tough year.. a year that make me growth?

nope.. i din grow.. i am still me ..expecting love and care from everyone.. the only difference is i am expecting more now..

or maybe yes..I believe that when people grow, they will saw different thing and open their eye view.. that is the time they know wat they wan in their life.. wat is important in their life.. of cus i m not like most of the people, expecting money and social position now.. but maybe a day in future, i ll think like them..and i will look down on myself for that.. this is life.. then why live?

hope 2006 is a new start for me.. wat i expect is happy.. i will do everything to make myself happy.. cheers..muaks muaks..

Lost..

my hope being destroyed

i have to bear the responsibility. This is my fault.

It’s my careless that cause "him" lost. I have no excuse to deny that.

Please forgive me because i need to find a new "he" .This is my responsibility.

Although "he" is better then "him". I ll still miss "him".

No one can replace "him".

but "he" is as important as "him" to me.

Do i need to forget "him"

No. I wont.

Farewell "him". Welcome "he".

One day I decided to quit…I quit my job,
my relationship, my spirituality… I wanted to quit
my life. I went to the woods to have one last talk
with God.

"God", I said. "Can you give me one
good reason not to quit?"

His answer surprised me…

"Look around", He said. "Do you see the fern
and the bamboo?"

"Yes", I replied.

"When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds,
I took very good care of them. I gave them light. I
gave them water. The fern quickly grew from the
earth. Its brilliant green covered the floor. Yet
nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not
quit on the bamboo.

In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and
plentiful. And again, nothing came from the
bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo."
He said.

"In year three there was still nothing from the
bamboo seed. But I would not quit. In year four,
again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. I
would not quit." He said.

"Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from
the earth. Compared to the fern it was seemingly
small and insignificant…But just 6 months later
the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall. It had
spent the five years growing roots. Those roots
made it strong and gave it what it needed to
survive. I would not give any of my
creations a challenge it could not handle." He said
to me.

"Did you know, my child, that all this time you
have been struggling, you have actually been
growing roots?"

"I would not quit on the bamboo. I will never quit
on you." "Don’t compare yourself to others." He
said. "The bamboo had a different purpose than the
fern. Yet they both make the forest beautiful."

"Your time will come", God said to me. "You will
rise high"

"How high should I rise?" I asked.

"How high will the bamboo rise?" He asked in
return.

"As high as it can?" I questioned

"Yes." He said, "Give me glory by rising as high
as you can."

I left the forest and bring back this story. I hope
these words can help you see that God will never
give up on you. He will never give up on you.

Never regret a day in your life.

Good days give you happiness; bad days give
you experiences; both are essential to life

This morning i went to bed at around 5 something, i cant fall into sleep, maybe i drank coffee earlier.. My heart feel veri uncomfortable, (as most of u know, my heart will pump fast after i drank coffee)..Therefore, i hav a side sleep in order to fell better. Suddenly, i feel that someone is hugging me from the back.. The creature shake my body..i can feel the strength of the creature and i feel veri irritated and uncomfortable, i try to turn around, but i cant.. i try to move my hand..but i cant.. at a moment, i thought i oledi dead.. so i try to breath.. huh..ya..i can feel my breath.. i breath heavy and heavier..waiting for the creature to release me.. after 10 or 20 second.. i feel that the strength is fade away, i come back to the world.. I open my eye..huh.. is it just a dream or the creature really came?.. haha..maybe i am just too tire..

說那麼多 原來讓我
絕望到與你更生疏
仿似在迫我 難堪到 盡快自己撲火

相愛是 千百個巴不得的擁抱
到這天 牽牽手都想戴雙手套
很厭倦 恐怕你從前就料到
台詞對白決絕到 再強悍亦根本受不到

來拒絕我 也當你愛著我
曾聽錯的 只好怪壞耳朵
能不記得 你這樣過份過
誰沒有遇過情裡翻波

來拒絕我 也當你愛著我
重新挽手 好比往日那麼
辛苦時間 就快度過
抱怨都因你慣了太緊張我
但你形容你 正在忘掉我

我懂得忍 如難自禁
待薄我 我哪怕犧牲
只寄望等你 牢騷過 就決定不變心

相愛是 只會記住相方的好處
到這天 開口想數清我的短處
討厭極 彷似我從來沒用處
為何最後你沒有 你沒有預先準備寬恕

在我甜夢裡 你又維護我

当缘份来的时候，

我们不好好珍惜，让它溜走，就不会回头了。

就算再一次和你相遇，感觉已经不一样了。

Hey ya, you are right. Human need to move forward. We cant reverse back wat had oledi happened. Appreciate every single opportunity and every single people that appear in your life. If they doesn’t appreciate u, they dun deserve ur love. Always remember, there are not only a guy or a gal in this world. If u cant catch it, just let go. Who knows someday when hav a better one and when u look back.. u find that u are such a silly guy at tat time. Anyway being a silly guy is always better than regret in the future.. I encourage u to try ur best. But dun force it. Remember, my ears are always open to people that needs my help..